Batman: Something Happens
Some months ago, I was having tremendous fun browsing the children's fiction section of the school library (being the last school year, I've found myself looking at all those things I couldn't care less about before), and one of the funniest books on display there was, without question, a Batman novel (yes, a plain-text novel) whose name eludes me. The front cover shows Batman and the Joker engaged in an intense sword fight while a small boy quivers in fear in a corner. They say you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, so don't. Let's have a plot summary of this unforgettable adventure...
In this action-packed thriller, the caped crusader meets up with a young boy (naturally) who loses his cat and ends up getting kidnapped by the Joker - who has decided for absolutely no good reason to become a pirate and pilot a flying ship with his face on it - while looking for it. After this, Batman rescues the boy from a fall and takes him to the Batcave, where he tries hypno-regression therapy or something in order for the boy to remember what happened (apparently Batman was unsure as to who might have been flying around in an airship with the Joker's huge beaming face on it).
In order to protect his alter-ego, Batman has Alfred - his butler - wear a Mickey Mouse mask during the hypnotism session (why he's even there at all is beyond me).
Eventually, the boy proves Batman's sneaking suspicion: the Joker's behind the dastardly plot! It later turns out that the Joker's evil scheme is to rob a bank (yes, he dressed up as a pirate and built a flying ship to rob a bank. And before you ask, I don't know.)
Things happen, Batman and the Joker have a sword fight, and everything ends. I'm not giving away the ending (hint: Batman doesn't die. In fact, no-one does. Actually, nothing has been achieved by anyone come the end).
You really don't need a review for this novel; reviews exist to help potential consumers decide whether or not they would want a product. This is a children's fiction book; if you don't want it, you'd better be lying.
Nonetheless, this book so kindled my imagination that I decided to write my own Batman novel! I finished the first chapter and it's lain untouched on my computer for some time, but it's there nonetheless. I call it, 'Batman: Attack of Penguin Hood'.
If you don't want to read it now, I'm really confused.
Unique Seling Point!! Batman befriends a girl, not a boy.
On the subject of Batman, the whole concept's always baffled me. If you're living in a city harbouring no less than seven twisted super-villains who deploy all kinds of diabolical attacks and schemes on its citizens, why on earth haven't you moved out?! And why does Batman even bother? For all the years he's been fighting crime, not one of the evil villains he's fought against has given up or even been caught to my knowledge. Maybe he's the one that should move out.
For a final note, the Gotham police shouldn't even exist. I wonder if they actually do.